Ezra's birth grandma

Ezra kissing birth grandma Kolene

We sent an e-mail out to the family to tell the same story we just related about our potential birth mom. We got a reply from Ezra's birth grandma and this is what she said.

I SURE HOPE THIS IS IT. "THEY" SAY 3YRS APART IS PERFECT, AND THAT WOULD BE JUST RIGHT FOR EZRA. YOU CAN COUNT ON US FOR PRAYERS. IF THIS YOUNG LADY KNEW WHAT I KNOW, SHE WOULD CHOOSE YOU FOR SURE. WE LOVE YOU GUYS,

I'd say this is another reason we keep in touch with the birth family.

Birth mom considering us

We have an exciting adoption possibility. We have a birth mom looking at us. She's looking at another couple but leaning towards us. I feel a little like Little Orphan Annie or The Rescuers Penny when she said, "It was adoption day at the orphanage. The man and lady came and looked at me. But they choosed the little red haired girl. She
was prettier than me." Now that part of the movie tears me up. How heartbreaking that is for us but that would kill me as a child. Fortunately the red head is on my team :) Surely she'll choose us. We've been praying to have another baby within 6 months. The baby is due Sept 1. Our 6 months would end in Oct. Again this could be "the
one". We're a little nervous to go through this again and yet we learned so much the last time and didn't come out with a baby (from our almost birth mom Amanda-not Randi). Of course we'll try it again. I had just decided to be content with the blessings we had and not bemoan the children we don't have (just like when I decided to not stress about getting married-I found Ryan). Sometimes that's how Heavenly Father operates.

The baby is a boy (they think). The birth mom is white with dark hair and eyes. She's in the military and hopes for little to no openness in adoption. That's okay. We just figure that's because she doesn't know how great an open adoption can be. Just like friends that turn down the gospel without knowing much about it. I wasn't an advocate for open adoption to begin with either.

Keeping in touch with birth family

Ezra with birth uncle Nick

One of our most frequently reoccurring questions we get is why do we keep in touch with the birth family. Probably the simplest answer is that we love them. Why keep in touch with your parents? Your in-laws? Even if your spouse died you'd likely keep in touch if you liked them at all. They'll always be a part of you. The birth family will always be a part of Ezra and because Ezra is very important to us, they'll always be a part of us. I think if you follow our blog you could easily feel the same way.

The next major reason is that they love Ezra. It's easy to love anyone who loves our son, in a healthy way (we're not ready to consider teenage romantic love yet). They love us too. The placement of our son was so heart wrenching and yet joyful. We were all working together to bring about the best thing for Ezra. We grew together in such a unique situation of joy and sorrow and then comforted by the spirit. It's the kind of close relationship we don't want to break off.

Ezra swimming with Daddy and birth uncle Sage

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Published

I wish I could copy and paste in my blog. I want to paste a link to my letter to the editor that got published about adoption. Actually it was a rebuff against abortion and urging people to consider adoption as an option. I'm going to try typing it in as best I can. It's http://blog.thenewstribune.com/letters/2010/07/02/alternative-choice/ I had no idea there were so many people angry about adoption. I took great comfort that most of the people arguing against my letter were very weak.